In our regular Splurge column, we’ve covered a wide variety of ridiculously expensive things. We’re talking S$26,000 fried egg earrings, S$310 matchbox sleeves, and beyond. It’s a list that keeps on giving.
Some, we can justify, while others leave us feeling like we’ve flipped through Crazy Rich Asians for the first time. None, however, have left us as floored as these Preppi survival kits.
Let’s address the concept. Preppi has made Prepsters, also known as ultimate emergency survival kits that promise to help you get through earthquakes, hurricanes, tornadoes or floods. As the tagline goes, Prepsters are “the best of everything you need, in the event you find yourself in the worst” situation possible.
There are a few Prepster editions — the original, the Black, and the Lite version. Presumably categorised according to the level of luxury one would need when faced with a harrowing natural disaster, these Prepsters come housed in chic doctor’s carry-alls, or in the case of the Lite, a barrel sling bag. You even have the option to monogram them.
The signature Prepster comes hand-packed with 175 items. You’re going to get Malin+Goetz toiletries, a solar phone charger (of course, you’ll need to Insta-story your tribulations), some ProBar meals, astronaut ice cream, a hip flask (suffering doesn’t mean you don’t need dessert or alcohol), a Marvis toothpaste and toothbrush (Colgate who? Darlie what?) and some poker playing cards (boredom during a tornado? God forbid). There’s also an extremely well-stocked first aid kit in the mix, and it’s all for S$530.
If the signature holds some measure of practicality, the Prepster Black demolishes that entirely. Priced at S$7,000, it’s marketed as a premium emergency survival set with all-black gadgets to satisfy any #rkoi (Rich Kids of Instagram) aesthetic. In reality though, it’s more of a James Bond role playing kit for the ultra-rich.
You’ll receive seriously techy gear in the Prepster Black, including a GPS satellite communicator, a night vision scope, an LED head lamp, and then some. There are also some questionable items like a caviar cooler, Kusmi darjeeling tea, and some Mast Brothers’ chocolate. The bar for plausibility is set really low here.
The Preppi kits do come with useful items, and we aren’t here to question that. Put the kit in the right hands, like those of an ex-military commando, and the kit could carry some people through some really taxing catastrophes. Maybe you’d even be able to knock down a couple of zombies in the process.
But the price, and the sheer bulk of the thing just screams entitlement for the ill-equipped, and therein resides the comedy. Bonus point — each kit is only enough to last the owner through 72 hours. Yes, for that price.
Still, if you want the security that a nameless extra in the Hunger Games has while charging towards the weaponised Cornucopia before getting hacked to pieces, you can purchase the Prepsters here.